We'll see

About two weeks ago we worked on our bills. We decided we wanted to narrow down how much we were spending on items so we each printed out our bank statements and went through each line item naming them. Such as entertainment, personal, gas, groceries etc. When I got to the website that I know prints for the minutes you pay I asked how you wanted to name this one in such a way that told you "I knew what it was for". Then I also mentioned you needed to start finding the free stuff so I wouldn't know.

Then one day last week I came home to find another wad of toilet paper in the trash can so I knew you had been busy. I was depressed all night, you even asked what was wrong. Then the next day you stayed home sick. I knew that you had viewed again since you might as well take advantage of me not being there. Again you asked what was wrong with me.

I asked, "what do you like in your girlfriends that you don't like in me?" We had a small discussion about this. I mentioned that as far as I knew you have been doing this for years but I just didn't know. I mentioned that since I know now it bugs me. Makes me wonder why you don't enjoy yourself with me as often as you do your girlfriends. I even brought up, again, wanting to get videos for both of us to enjoy. You finally basically told me that did not interest you. Basically it is a self enjoyment thing. You asked if I wanted you to stop looking at it. I told you I could ask you to stop till I was blue in the face but obviosly that will never happen (as mentioned before I've flat out asked MANY times before).

We had another discussion and you mentioned that you can never masturbate again. I told him I never said that. So I guess you only associate porn with masturbation. I told you that of course I occansionally masturbate but when I do I'm thinking of you - which is true! I don't need to think of others or watch porn.

But anyway you haven't viewed since our discussion. I assume it will happen again after a few months or so but maybe you will be more discreet than you have been the past month or so. And I did bring up the toilet paper wads so maybe you'll flush them now instead of throwing them away for me to see them.

We'll see. However I do take the words, "Love, Honor and Cherish" seriously.